rekindle

 It had been years since weˋd seen them but our seats hadnˋt even warmed the chairs before it was like weˋd seen them yesterday. I often think that Iˋm so chill, but I had tears in my eyes when we left. Ruth used to hand raise our baby parrots; Carm and John played golf together so weˋve known them for decades!

Itˋs cooled down tremendously - we went from a sweaty sleep to one burrowed under the covers. But thereˋs not a cloud in the sky to shadow what will be a perfect day for hanging around outside. 

On Ray Bradburyˋs writing advice Iˋve started a list of words and phrases that will hopefully trigger some memories that can be woven into stories. I had trouble coming up with words other than what I could see around me, let alone a story about it, but Iˋll persevere. Iˋd like to get back to writing like I did when I was part of the writing group.

We had a conversation last night about the steadiness of our emotions and if they fluctuate wildly or are a smooth line. I realized suddenly that Iˋve finally settled into a into a comfortable evenness, but more than that itˋs become a pleasure.  For years I struggled with feeling flat, it seemed so blah after years of ups and downs, but now I welcome the feeling. Awesome!

Iˋm on real medications for bipolar but on a lark in January I started taking CBD daily. I have now had 7 months with no anxiety (which was a nearly daily experience), and not only that, I feel great! Almost euphoric but not quite. Iˋm pretty sure Iˋm not having an extended period of hypo-mania although in some ways I feel like I do in the first few hours/days of that mood shift. It might be psychosomatic but thatˋs okay too :-) 

Awesome!

“catching sight of old friends”

“gathering around the table for fun conversation”

“stepping into the villetta”

“Grace said ˋOh my Godˋ when we stepped back into the camper”

“flashes of insight”