tis the season

 A little red squirrel is taking advantage of the above freezing temperatures to stash sunflower seeds in a (not so) secret hiding spot. He picks up one seed from under the bird feeder and then runs with it to a spot about 15 feet away (taking the long way there), and then back for another seed. Not sure why he doesn't fill his cheeks as the one by one method seems like it would burn more calories than it gains!

Hmmm… maybe I should take a page from the squirrels method! One bite of cookie, run all over the house, another bite of cookie, more running. Yes! That's the answer 😀 

Carm has gone off for some boxing day sales at Canadian Tire - I stayed home, otherwise I would have stocked up on Christmas tree decorations, forcing me to buy another tree to shoehorn in somewhere. If I could figure where that somewhere is I'd go for it… unfortunately, there isn't inch to fit another tree! If I had millions and millions of dollars, and a huge house with lots and lots of rooms, I'd have a different tree for each room! I’d have a silver tree, a pink one… and so it would go with burgundy, gold, and blue. I'd need lots of rooms and perhaps fewer naughty dogs.

I shouldn't blame the dogs for being naughty as they haven't touched the tree at all but it’s fully out of reach of Lupa so maybe she’s just missing the opportunity! 

Did everyone have a nice Christmas? It's a funny sort of time with so much pressure and expectations. 

We started the fun last Monday at a local restaurant where we met Ken and Francine for lunch, with coffee & cookies back here (that's one dozen gone!). Ken and Carm worked together for years, but I'm glad to say that there wasn't much work talk! Or if there was, I was too busy visiting with Francine to notice 😉 

Tuesday it was snowing and I was freaking out a bit so, Carm drove me in to take Mom to a followup appointment with her radiation oncologist… they are scheduling a scan for sometime in January so we'll keep our fingers crossed… On the way home I drove the snowy roads to get some practice. In the next snowstorm, we'll go out to a parking lot somewhere so I can get a better feel of what slippery roads feel like. 

It's embarrassing to be so chicken about driving in the snow - even as a passenger I get into a near panic attack with icy roads. Somehow I have to get past that and hopefully, some practice will ease my stress.

Carm got the truck Krowned on Wednesday. It’s a 2007 with no visible rust to speak of so far so we'll continue to do our best to keep it on the road - not sure what we'll do when it's life is over, but it's in great shape now with low milage.

Thursday Kari came for supper to help us celebrate Solstice! Almost one more second of light! Bubbles and a slightly traditional scandinavian dinner of meatballs, mashed potatoes, and gravy. Roasted brussels sprouts and carrots rounded out the meal. I got Carm to cut me some Norwegian spruce boughs to decorate the table - so many needles everywhere! It looks a bit like a tree has fallen on the table, leaving a few spots clear for plates. I love it!

Friday morning Carm braved the pre Christmas Costco crowds - he dropped me off at Mom's so that he could get out of there without too much extra shopping… not to mention losing me in the crowds! It's become a bit of a tradition for Carm to get Mom's Costco stuff while I have a nice visit :-)  I'm pretty sure that in the New Year she'll be itching to get out herself - she's started driving herself for some grocery shopping. She's always loved getting out shopping in the crowds :-) 

Gosh! That leaves Saturday… perhaps a lazy day - or not! Dozens of cardamom buns flew in and out of the oven, and for some reason I had two giant bags of carrots that were starting to go bad… I peeled and chopped… some in rounds to be frozen for soup, some grated for Moroccan salad, and the rest for a ginger carrot soup… 

It seemed impossible, but Sunday was Christmas Eve! Trudie, Leo, and Kari came for a quiet Christmas Eve dinner. And then suddenly, with barely time to fall asleep, it was Christmas day! 

Yesterday we mooched around the house for the morning, then loaded the car with a ton of food and gifts - it was Christmas Day and the whole immediate family, (plus Erik's girlfriend Norlan), was gathering at Mom's! It was a great time that passed by quickly… We didn't do a traditional Christmas dinner but instead laid out tourtiere, quiches, salmon, wings, buns, meat dip, cheeses, etc. It was a bit of a grazing afternoon. Instead of the usual gift extravaganza, we did a ‘Grinch Christmas’ gift exchange which was lots of fun! A new tradition was made!

The dogs slept in till almost 10am this morning! Yesterday’s five hours standing at the window, howling and stressing, wore them out… I wish they could learn to settle down when we are gone, but I fear they never will… I end up stressing about them and feeling bad that they are feeling bad… 

I alluded to it earlier, but it's another green Christmas! Yesterday was above freezing which made for good driving for everyone, but it could be April out there… (oh how I wish)... Today is more of the same.

I didn't take even one photo yesterday :-(  Mom took the one of Carm and I.  A few days ago I tried to take a ‘pet portrait’ of the two dogs, but they are not keen on getting their photos take so didn't cooperate beyond staying in one place. Spike was photogenic and was a bit of a poser - I have heaps and heaps of nice photos of him, but Alas! Very few of Adia & Lupa.

Awesome!

“getting together with friends”

“one more second”

“driving on good roads”

“family together”

“a sleep-in”

oh tannanbaum

 A giant rain storm is bearing down on us, due to hit tonight and carry on until Tuesday. Hopefully it stays above freezing otherwise we might get socked in!

Friday started early in the morning with a trip to Mom & Dad's for a visit and shopping at Costco. After her few things from Costco was unloaded at Mom's, we zoomed home, with a stop for another few plastic cookie bins! 

It was a beautiful day on Friday, so, with two giant bins of gingerbread, a bag of icing sugar, a bag of jujubes and jellybeans, I made the trek to Kirsten's for a girls night filled with sugar, food colouring, and dangerous scissors! Oh tannenbaum, oh tannenbaum… dozens of gingerbread trees waiting to get glazed with weirdly green icing and decorated with jujubes and jellybeans…

We took care of ponies etc, and then with freshly washed hands, spread parchment over the huge kitchen island, a snowy landscape for the forest of cookies waiting to become Christmas trees. Food colouring and icing sugar came together to make a colourful glue! The jujubes were meant to be baubles on the trees but full size they overwhelmed the gingerbread - they needed to be smaller… Kirsten took the scissors away from me after I cut not only a jujube but the fleshy bit of my finger… the cut from last week is just about healed… 

It was another sunny day Saturday! I headed home in the morning after a wake up coffee. I had a recipe of serinakakers and another of chocolate crinkle cookies chilling in the fridge that I wanted to bake.

Today my aim was to get the ‘topsy turveys’ done (aka Chinese Chews) and some other kind to make a total of six varieties… I finally settled on snickerdoodles - we need some cinnamon in the cookie jar! By 2:30 two trays of topsy's were baked and rolled in powdered sugar, as well as two batches of snickerdoodles (6 dozen!). I think that's it. I've gone through countless pounds of butter, a blizzard of flour, and a mountain of sugar. Well… I might try making some meringue cookies next week if I get a spare day.

My new baking trays and cooling racks arrived today right after I put away the last of the baking! Great timing :-/

Awesome!

“an easy drive to Kirsten's”

“laughing at the mess we made - icing everywhere”

“more and more cookies”

“two sunny days!!!”

“so much Christmas music”

three kinds

 No men, just dozens of gingerbread trees, shortbread stars, and chocolate mounds have danced out of the oven so far - three kinds baked - there's dough for serinakakers in the fridge and an extra batch of the chocolate crinkle dough ready for baking tonight or tomorrow. There are a few others on the to-do list but I don't think I'll make it to seven different kinds this year! Although who knows what next week might bring ;-)  Friday, Saturday, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday are already booked with outings, but! gosh! There are still 11 days till Christmas so another pound or two of sugar and butter might be thrown into the oven.

My kitchenaid is getting a full workout!

Looking at the calendar is starting to freak me out! The last several months have been a blur with time not passing at all but simultaneously moving at light speed. It seems like just the other day that I was with Mom at her first cancer appointment and yet a lifetime has passed.

Yesterday Kirsten and I met up at Mom & Dad's for a visit and shopping outing :-) I think M&D were happy to get out of the house for a bit. Mom has started doing small outings herself, even driving. It takes a lot to slow her down! 

There were bits of sunshine which was lovely, but the wind was blowing a gale - I was glad that I'd worn my little puffer coat and didn't rely on the cute raincoat I picked up at liquidation on Tuesday. Tomorrow though! It's supposed to warm up a bit so it will get christened tomorrow!

(another 3 dozen of the chocolate ones are on their way tomorrow!)

After shuffling cookies around constantly on the cooling racks, I decided that I needed more racks… was going to get another big one (on sale at Home Hardware), but realized that for just double the price (ha ha, just double!), we could get TWO stainless steel baking sheets with TWO cooling racks 😉 

I realized after a few days of lacklustre mood that what was missing from my days was music! As soon as I remedied that with a bit of Christmas music and some old favs, I was be-bopping around with much more energy than I’ve had for days!

Sunday, Pat came for supper and two episodes of ‘the Orville’... I unearthed a pork tenderloin from the depths of the freezer. Cooking it in the instant pot for 1 minute with a full natural release makes for a moist and tender piece of meat, just this side of pink. And the gravy! Mushrooms, onion and herbs meld with the pork juices - a bit salty but so good! I've packaged the leftovers into little containers in the freezer for when I have a hankering for french fries and gravy! The next day I sent Carm to the grocery store for another package…

Do you ever get partway into a book and realize that it just isn't for you? I shelved one yesterday after it took a violent turn… I don't need that! I want love and joy and sweetly sick happiness in my life!

Awesome!

“blue jays”

“colour of my new raincoat”

“christmas bandanas on the dogs after their nail trim”

“bins and bins of cookies!”

“dogs asleep in a sunspot”

Old wild men

More grey skies today… fitting as Kirsten had to send Murphy, their English Cocker spaniel on his way to rainbow bridge. He turned 16 yesterday. Anyone who has lost a beloved dog knows how sad it is to lose them no matter their age and also knows that the loss sometimes squeezes your heart so hard the tears can't help but flow.

Monday it will be 2 years since Spike went on his final journey… that was such a hard day… most of the time I can look at his photos with a loving remembrance, only tinged with sadness, but today the sadness has settled into my heart, as sadness has touched the hearts of Kirsten and her family. Hopefully it won't be long before it eases into loving memory.

Murphy and Spike were only a few months apart in age, and I envisioned a few years of the ‘cousins’ enjoying each other's company in a doddering old way… now they can be together in our hearts only.

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight."

- Kahlil Gibran

I really have no excuse, but the last few days I've been so lazy! I’ve had no motivation to throw flour and sugar around to dance some cookies in and out of the oven! I have looked at the list of cookies I've made in years past but haven't even decided which ones to make… For sure I'll make shortbread and gingerbread. And also the cherry filled ‘topsy turveys’, perhaps the chocolate crinkle cookies, and probably the serinakakers too. I love the aperol spritz cookies and the cardamom cookies too, so if I get really motivated… 

Christmas is bearing down fast so I'd better get busy! Only 16 days! 

Awesome!

“birds finding the feeder”

ring that bell!

 It was an emotional few minutes this morning as Mom emerged from her last radiation treatment and rang the bell! There was a rushed flurry of photo & video taking… I should have stuck with photos as I don't seem to know the video controls of my phone camera - dooh! Luckily Kirsten got a great video - not sure about Graham's photos.

Saturday's birthday dinner for Marie was great fun with lots of spirited conversations and laughter. And we were home by 6:30! 

Trees from tiny to tall spewed from a bunch of plastic bins and bags on Sunday. Garlands supplanted window swags, gold bows glimmering under the coloured lights strung around the living room. The Christmas tree was triumphantly carried from the basement to its December place of honour.

opening her last present from the basket of daily gifts that Kari and her siblings sent.

Of course I spent a ‘certain’ amount of time looking for one wayward tree and a few angels. I'd like to say that it was a joyous day but unfortunately rummaging through our house full of junk dashed my spirits… Once it was done with all the candles and fairy lights, I sat back and felt happy, or at least as happy as I could with snow in the forecast... 

Part of my angst was triggered by the upcoming storm bearing down on us. The plan was for me to drive into town Monday afternoon to spend the night at Mom & Dad's in readiness for today's early morning appointment. No big deal right? Ha ha, for most people but I have an irrational fear of driving in the snow… like an almost freakout fear… I’d rather not be so stressed out but no matter what I tell myself, panic sets in. As it turns out, the snow stopped by midday on Monday, so by the time I left for the city, the roads were reasonably clear but slushy… Thankfully the traffic was light so I was able to take my time and I did it, sure my knuckles were white but still!

Kirsten spent the night too, so we had a nice little family evening with Mom dozing in her chair.

Awesome!

“the trees were gorgeous”

“arriving at Mom's safe and sound”

“twinkling lights”

“coloured lights”

and the most awesome of all?

“Mom's last radiation appointment!!!”

pre mania perhaps

 The following was from Thursday morning… as happens so often, I failed to post right away, thinking that I'd do it later… but… here we are on Saturday afternoon!

I read a book once (decades ago), where the heroine had big thumbs (a quick google search for books with a woman who has bandaged thumbs garnered the correct book! ‘Only Cowgirls Get the Blues’). Why did that book pop into my mind this morning? Well, I've got a giant bandage on my left thumb since I sliced it open on a can in the recycle bin. Ugh. Yesterday I put on my task list to tidy one shelf of the pantry - I got on a roll, and Carm started helping by emptying and washing all the containers, plastic and otherwise, of ancient food, so I felt motivated to finish!

The chaos was slightly overwhelming - I almost gave up a few times - but perseverance along with Carm's help, got the job done! At the end of the cleaning frenzy, the recycle bin was overflowing with cans and plastic containers so I pulled it out and started organizing it to make more room - just as I was pulling my hand out - slice! blood! youch! So… now I have a giant bandage on my thumb.

Tuesday we had our biannual trip into the city for the dentist. We have our appointments coordinated which makes it more efficient - parking downtown can be tricky, not to mention the traffic is crazy around there, so I like Carm to do the driving!

The sun is peeking through the clouds this morning and it was sunny yesterday (but bloody cold and windy)! Hurrah for a bit of sun… we did get some overnight snow Tuesday night which is lingering… I think it's supposed to warm up to 6C today, so perhaps it will all disappear (one can only hope).

Those pumpkin muffins that I thought would be so great… mouldy :-( Note to self: freeze individually and thaw as needed. boo hiss! With my thumb all bandaged up it is nearly impossible to wash dishes etc, so I'll have to wait a day or two to make a new batch. It seems I've been experimenting on mould growth as I unearthed the rest of the orange cake and it is mouldy too, although I was expecting that.

I've been making a lot of cakes lately and have been throwing out the last few pieces as I get sick of them pretty fast. I don't recall ever getting sick of cookies so I think I'll transition my baking and start practising for Christmas baking ;-)

—--------

Back to today! We had a quick trip to Costco with Mom. Carm went off on his own as he likes to zoom through, while I stayed with Mom. It was so busy and we figured if we split up we wouldn't have to worry so much about getting separated… how many times has Carm been at one end of the store while I search through the crowds for him at the other end! Poor Mom didn't get to browse like she might have liked too - but maybe it's better to get out of the covid cesspool asap!

Yesterday I took Mom to her third last radiation treatment! She also had an appointment with the speech therapist - she's a lovely lady who was very encouraging and upbeat. There are some exceptional people on the cancer treatment team! Mom is pulling through like a trooper but is getting more fatigued, which is not helped by the terrible nights and (lack) of sleep she's been having.

I should backtrack quickly to Thursday after I wrote what was above. I decided that I would stick my nose into our closet and tackle one piled up mess of clothes… an hour or two later, I'd done most of the closet! I didn't purge as much as I should have, but did emerge with a tower of yoga pants that don't fit very well anymore, not that I wore them much anyway! Next week we'll drop them off at the thrift store :-)

I couldn't believe how many black t-shirts I have!

Also, two days of organizing in a row has me on high alert for a potential mood shift... organizing is usually the first sign that I'm tipping into mania and the other night my head was starting to spin so I've been adding some extra meds and taking a bit of quiet time to slow things down.

Have you seen the movie about Mr. Dressup? I didn't realize he was American and also didn't know that Mr. Rogers got his TV start in Canada on CBC. It was a nice tribute but also a bit of a tear jerker... I don't recommend it if you are feeling a little wobbly. Sometimes I feel just fine and then some little thing sends me into the deep end. It doesn't happen often but is a reminder to not stuff feelings quite so much!

Awesome!

“pretty snow covered trees”

sorry my list is a little short today! We are getting ready to rush out for a birthday celebration.