am I

I could see the heat rising from the gravel laneway from the late afternoon sun so I grabbed my little speaker and headed to the pool. As I slipped into the cool/warm water I thought back to this morning’s swim straight out of bed. Luxury.

‘Stairway to Heaven’ was belting out of the grey music miracle as I floated around and around supported by a pool noodle. Bliss. Around and around I went, at each lap I thought “just one more’ and so it went. Then I realized that I didn’t have anything else to do so why not float as long as I wished. Freedom.

The music reminded me of so many high school dances where I’d cling to some boy, the latest crush. So much angst: did he like me? am I pretty enough? am I smart enough? and so the “enough’s” went. I’m not sure when they ended but thankfully age eventually erased most of that anxiety.

I segued to laughing out loud thinking about the countless bad perms that I had in order to feel ‘pretty’ enough. The first one basically made my head look like a triangle. A really fuzzy triangle. Sadly I don’t have any photos.  Oh so many tries (cause surely this time it will happen) to look like Farah Faucett. Oh so many failures!

Awesome!

“pool noodles - $2 will buy a summer full of joy”

“the filter for the water pump was delivered today and it fits perfectly”

“peonies”

“music by the pool”