counting down

It's not been quite a week since I last wrote but it's been busy! Each day we've gotten a little more prepared for winter, even though we've been lured into a false sense that winter won't arrive with the record breaking warm weather we've had on some days. Today is cold and rainy which is what I'd expect for the beginning of November.

On Friday afternoon we had Mary & Gary, friends that we met camping in 2018, over for coffee. We had a great time getting to know them better! Saturday Jo Ellen, Don, Deirdre, and Chris came for a leisurely lunch (beef stew w yorkshire pudding). We hadn't all been together for YEARS which is crazy as we used to spend a lot of time together at work. We had a daily coffee ritual that lasted for decades before we started retiring. I think I was the first to go. It's crazy how we let time go by without getting together, but that will change! 

Sunday we were meant to meet up with Ken and Francine, but he woke up feeling ill, so we'll reschedule - don't want to take chances on getting sick with just ELEVEN days till we leave on our trip! I WILL NOT GET SICK THIS CRUISE. Louder for those in the back! I WILL NOT GET SICK THIS CRUISE!

The piles of clothes in the spare room have been shifted and re-arranged, tried on and some discarded. I have a huge pile of 'no go' and a smaller pile of 'maybe but most likely not'. And heaps of clothes that will make outfits for 10 dress up dinners, and 10 days in the sun. I think I'm bringing 4 bathing suits!

Our cabin is on the same deck as the pool so I foresee having a dip in the pool a few times a day. And there'll be a few beaches to visit as well :-) Need to get sandy in places you shouldn't!

Our medallions arrived yesterday!

Yesterday, Lupa endured 45 minutes of clipping - she was reasonably cooperative  😀 Adia gets off lightly with just a bit of time in her crate to keep her from tracking the hair that is flying every which way. Carm was pretty cooperative for his bout with the clipper blades - he's coiffed and ready for our vacation :-)

Today I met with Mom & Kirsten for some retail therapy :-) and some lunch. 

I've been feeling fantastic since the fast last week. I don't know why, but it seems to have bumped me back from feeling exhausted and unmotivated, to having energy to spare. I'm not hypomanic - I can sit down with a book and actually focus, which I can't do at all if I'm spiralling up, but I'm also not lying exhausted on the sofa all day 😅 It's great! I'm curious to try a fast again next time my mood drops to see if it actually helps or was just a coincidence. Yesterday I walked for 90 minutes (over 8km!) and still had enough energy to happily putter around the house :-)

I did a bit of reading about fasting and bipolar but there isn't a lot out there. What I did read was heartening though. I'm hoping that I have another way to keep in the centre! If you run across anything counter-fasting for bipolar please share it!

Awesome!

"friends together"

"getting to know new friends"

"leftover yorkshire pudding at 1am"

"the f'ing cranberry cake that I can't stop eating"

medallion

It's not been quite a week since I last wrote but it's been busy! Each day we've gotten a little more prepared for winter, even though we've been lured into a false sense that winter won't arrive with the record breaking warm weather we've had on some days. Today is cold and rainy which is what I'd expect for the beginning of November.

On Friday afternoon we had Mary & Gary, friends that we met camping in 2018, over for coffee. We had a great time getting to know them better! Saturday Jo Ellen, Don, Deirdre, and Chris came for a leisurely lunch (beef stew w yorkshire pudding). We hadn't all been together for YEARS which is crazy as we used to spend a lot of time together at work. We had a daily coffee ritual that lasted for decades before we started retiring. I think I was the first to go. It's crazy how we let time go by without getting together, but that will change! 

Sunday we were meant to meet up with Ken and Francine, but he woke up feeling ill, so we'll reschedule - don't want to take chances on getting sick with just ELEVEN days till we leave on our trip! I WILL NOT GET SICK THIS CRUISE. Louder for those in the back! I WILL NOT GET SICK THIS CRUISE!

The piles of clothes in the spare room have been shifted and re-arranged, tried on and some discarded. I have a huge pile of 'no go' and a smaller pile of 'maybe but most likely not'. And heaps of clothes that will make outfits for 10 dress up dinners, and 10 days in the sun. I think I'm bringing 4 bathing suits!

Our cabin is on the same deck as the pool so I foresee having a dip in the pool a few times a day. And there'll be a few beaches to visit as well :-) Need to get sandy in places you shouldn't!

Our medallions arrived today!

Today Lupa endured 45 minutes of clipping - she was reasonably cooperative today  😀 Adia gets off lightly with just a bit of time in her crate to keep her from tracking the hair that is flying every which way. Carm was pretty cooperative for his bout with the clipper blades - he's coiffed and ready for our vacation :-)

I've been feeling fantastic since the fast last week. I don't know why, but it seems to have bumped me back from feeling exhausted and unmotivated, to having energy to spare. I'm not hypomanic - I can sit down with a book and actually focus, which I can't do at all if I'm spiralling up, but I'm also not lying exhausted on the sofa all day 😅 It's great! I'm curious to try a fast again next time my mood drops to see if it actually helps or was just a coincidence. Yesterday I walked for 90 minutes (over 8km!) and still had enough energy to happily putter around the house :-)

I did a bit of reading about fasting and bipolar but there isn't a lot out there. What I did read was heartening though. I'm hoping that I have another way to keep in the centre! If you run across anything counter-fasting for bipolar please share it!

Awesome!

"friends together"

"getting to know new friends"

"leftover yorkshire pudding at 1am"

"the f'ing cranberry cake that I can't stop eating"

Fast or slow

I almost made the entire 60 hours but this morning at the 55 hour mark, I caved and broke my fast. My last fast was 44 hours so I feel that I exceeded! Honestly, I felt great until I woke up in the middle of the night feeling hungry and a bit sick… luckily I had prepared a jar of chia pudding with blueberries before I went to bed. I could have powered through the next few hours, but I was in a weakened mental state in the middle of the night… I ate half of it and crawled back into bed. 

I think my body likes these longer fasts as I felt fantastic and had more energy than I've had for a while. My mood was also good. I didn't feel deprived and honestly, for the most part it was very easy. I drank tons of coffee, tea, and water which kept me well hydrated and staved off the hunger. Oh sure, there were times that I was starving, but that usually only lasted several minutes and then I'd be fine. It wasn't much worse than a normal day when I'm trying to eat healthily.

This morning I ate the rest of the chia pudding, chased down with a protein drink, then a bit later I had a banana with peanut butter. For lunch I had broccoli, soy beans, roasted mushrooms, pumpkin seeds and tofu - I'm eating to rebuild my microbiome :-)

Fingers crossed that I got the health benefits from this longer fast! It is supposed to be excellent for my immune system and overall health - my hope is that it will prepare me for the onslaught of germs on the cruise!

The weather has blessed us with another few days of temps in the double digits - today's record setting high is 21C! Carm managed to eek in another round of golf which is a blessing as he hasn't been able to for 3 weeks…

Countdown to cruise! We dragged the suitcases upstairs yesterday so I can see what's what. I've started trying on outfits - I'm happy with some, but others, well, they'll be okay I guess, but they are strongly in the 'middle aged' woman on a cruise vibe. The purple 'sausage' dress actually looks a lot better than it did and so does the black cocktail dress. I re-tried on the sequin dress and gold silk gown and they are good too, so a win all around!

Awesome!

"55 hours!"

"chia pudding with blueberries - oh so delightful"

"crazy late October weather"

"dresses fitting"

hibernate

Summer is officially over - the trailer is back home and winterized. Anything that can freeze has been brought into the house, leaving just a few odds and ends to sort through over the next few days. Earlier in the week, the forecast had been for rain for today, but Mother Nature was on our side with not a cloud in the sky. Oh sure, it's chilly and a bit windy, but overall a great day to bring the beast home.

We were blessed with a few more nice days so we spent Thursday and Friday at the villetta, getting a last hurrah before the long winter. 

Next: figure out what clothes I'll bring on the cruise and start getting the house and pets ready to be in Christina's capable hands - we leave in less than 3 weeks! Ackkk!

Awesome!

"home safe and sound"

"winterized!"

"extra sunshine"

"hot bubble bath with sun streaming in the windows"

Test using gmail to post

It's another case of you can't get there from here... blogger and google docs are no longer working together... so now I have to write my post in Google Docs, copy and paste it into gmail, send the mail to blogger, go into blogger app, open the new draft and publish from there. So an extra step which makes NO SENSE! I tried editing directly in the blogger app but some of the keyboard was not working, although it seems to be working find now? WTF!!!

Yesterday we were sitting in the villetta, huddled against the cold as the furnace rumbled. It only took half an hour to get it up to a bearable temperature which I think is pretty good considering it was 52F when we arrived. We were given a hand by the sun which was streaming into the windows - an unexpected blessing as the forecast was for clouds all day.

So yes, it's that time of year! We'll eek out another few days and then we'll be home for 7 months - yes, SEVEN MONTHS! Ack! We had a blessed summer and fall though - I think I spent just over 20 nights here this year. 

I have to mention the weather though! We had unseasonably warm weather at the beginning of the week so took advantage of that to get the garlic planted! 154 cloves were carefully dug into the ground with Carm doing the lion's share of the work, I was basically just decor, handing tools and cloves as required while he got his hands dirty. 

I think it was in the mid 20s when we did the work.

Last week I spent a night here without Carm so Kirsten, Mom, Nissa, and I could have a 'girls' night 😀 I took advantage and hung out by myself for a while - I'll miss having a little getaway! Not that I have anything to escape from, but sometimes an afternoon puttering in my little villetta is exactly what 'the doctor ordered'... 

It's always been my happy place!

I've started getting a bit more energy and have felt my spirits reviving the last few days, but weirdly have also been struggling with some anxiety at the same time… bringing the trailer home is a big trigger, and then our Caribbean escape is coming up quickly (3 weeks today) - leaving the house and pets is hard for me!

Yesterday morning I ended up walking for 75 minutes and even had a bit of energy leftover to dance around the house a bit! Yippee!

Olaf and Steph gifted me an Ancestry kit for my birthday - the results are in! I'm 34% Scottish, 32% Norwegian, a bit of Swedish, Northern England, German, and surprisingly 1% Italian! I am truly a mutt! But most importantly, I'm more Viking than my Viking cosplay brother! Maybe I'll have to get some duds so that I can play the part. Although maybe a kilt would be more in keeping with my ancestry!

Last night we had a congenial supper around the little table in the villetta. Lots of laughter, although I felt a little tinge of sadness that it will be months until we are back here again.

Today, after coffee and a walk with Kirsten, Carm and I went into town for lunch and a bit of retail therapy. There are lots of cute little businesses in the downtown area - I scored a few little finds 😀

So, home and winterize tomorrow… pool away on Sunday… then it will be time to start trying on clothes and figuring out what I'm going to wear on our cruise - AND hopefully, the two dresses that inspired this vacation, still fit!

Awesome!

"cosy in a sun spot"

"getting the garlic planted on a beautiful October day"

"blue October skies"

"first episode of 'Only Murders in the Building'"

"supper in the villetta"

"a walk down the road"

giving thanks

 The big day has come and gone… next on the horizon, bringing the villetta home for the winter. On one hand, it seems we just took the camper to Kirsten's but then again, so much has happened since that it seems like ages ago. Time is funny that way!

Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday was a great success - 23 people gathered around tables groaning with the weight of plates piled high with turkey and all the sides that go with it. Kirsten cooked a turkey ‘on the day’, while we brought what we cooked at home on Thursday so we had heaps of turkey (and some leftovers!). The stuffing balls were a hit. We had mashed potatoes, brussels sprouts, other stuffing, Mom brought turnip casserole, Marion brought a broccoli salad, Mathias made cranberry sauce. And then there was a table full of desserts! Mom made a fantastic carrot cake and some brownies, while I made cranberry cake. She also brought a pumpkin pie. There was lots to choose from!

It was lovely meeting new people and wonderful that so many of us were able to gather. 

Last week Carm and I got a COVID booster and today we got jabbed for the flu so we should be good for our cruise which is just in 30 days! Yikes - time to start getting prepared for that!

Overall it's been a good week and there are signs that I'm starting to get some energy back. For two days in a row, I've gotten off the treadmill feeling as good as when I got on, so that's a big improvement! I even managed a few extra exercises this morning ;-)

It's about time! I need to get more active to start burning off the weight that I've gained in the last month! All that hard work over the summer is going to be for naught if I don't get control of my appetite again… I'm sure it's the change in light and weather but I'm starving almost all the time so it's been hard to keep eating healthy… and then there was the cranberry cake which I scarfed down…

I was so gun-ho over the summer with keeping to healthy eating but I've lost focus and determination - I need a mental reset! I need to re dedicate myself to health.

Awesome!

“gathering together” 

“23 people crammed around 18 feet of table”

“cosy on the camper”

headstart

 On Sunday I thought that I was bouncing back to my normal self… yesterday morning proved me wrong… I did the treadmill, but gosh, it was hard and I had to really push myself to get the whole hour done… there were a few times when I thought I'd have to get off to lie down, but by putting one foot in front of the other, I did it. 

Should I have done it? Perhaps not as I hit the wall pretty hard. I have a hard time doing things ‘in halves’ but I MUST get better at that! But I paid for it the rest of the day… I don't know how I managed, but somehow, with a herculean effort powered by tunes blasting on my headphones, I got the stuffing balls made for the weekend… two and a half large loaves of texas toast style bread, seasoning, butter, eggs, onion, celery, and homemade turkey stock came together with Carm's help to make just over 50 balls of Thanksgiving goodness. I've popped them into the freezer - they'll just need to be thawed and warmed in the oven ‘on the day’.

We are expecting 22 people so any headstart is a good one!

The rest of the week is just as busy, so I am PRAYING that yesterday was just a blip. 

But today is better! I managed the full 60 minutes on the treadmill (just over 5km) with a bit of extra energy, and then, again with Carm's help, made a double batch of Vegan Lentil ‘meatloaf’! The vegetarians will have something to eat on Thanksgiving! And I have an extra for the freezer here. As I was putting it together I realized that almost all the ingredients are on the list of foods that bolster our health defences :-) so I will be happy to have some handy for quick suppers :-)  (well, quick on the night of but gosh, I was cooking for over 2 ½ hours!).

later in the day after finding out the lentil loaf is too moist and won't hold together… blah… back into the oven for a bit… Do you ever have times when you'd like to just cease to exist? Not suicidal thoughts, more, if I closed my eyes and checked out it would be a relief… I felt overwhelmed and not up to the task, I could have crawled into bed with the covers over my head, but somehow even that wasn't good enough as I knew my ‘to do’ list would still haunt/taunt me and it's my mind that I wanted to get away from, not my body.

 this too shall pass…

Awesome!

“stuffing balls done”

“a bit of sunshine after a day of grey”

“Carm helping out”

“lentil loaf done”

“full rainbow”

bread balls

 OMG… I don't know how I managed, but somehow, with a herculean effort powered by tunes blasting on my headphones, I got the stuffing balls made for next weekend… two and a half large loaves of texas toast style bread, seasoning, butter, eggs, onion, celery, and homemade turkey stock came together with Carm's help to make just over 50 balls of Thanksgiving goodness. I've popped them into the freezer - they'll just need to be thawed and warmed in the oven ‘on the day’.

I thought yesterday that I was bouncing back to my normal self… this morning I did the treadmill, but gosh, it was hard and I had to really push myself to get the whole hour done… there were a few times when I thought I'd have to get off to lie down, but by putting one foot in front of the other, I did it. 

The rest of the week is just as busy, so I am PRAYING that today is just a blip. 

Awesome!

“stuffing balls done”

“a bit of sunshine after a day of grey”

“Carm 

helping out”

indoor jungle

 October fifth… the deck has been put to sleep for the winter. Summer is now officially over - boo hoo! Carm hoisted giant pots of plants into the house and then we wrestled the sofa & chairs in… the house looks like a showroom from ‘the Brick’, with four sofas and an extra chair! It's also a bit like a jungle in here and who knows how many earwigs got transported into the house. But here we are… for another seven and one half months… yes 7 ½ months!!! OMG.

I don't remember the exact day - it was somewhere between the 3rd and 6th of October in 2004 that I got hit with my bipolar diagnosis - yes, TWENTY years ago! Gosh, it seems like forever ago. I remember sitting in that blue armchair like it was yesterday, reeling like I'd just gotten a life sentence…

It was early in the week and Carm was scheduled to leave for a business trip on the weekend. I was suicidal with a plan… thankfully I was thinking clearly enough that I had Carm hide away everything that I needed and then hunkered down for a week on my own… I was able to get friends to come visit some of the days, and Carm phoned a few times a day, but I was mostly alone… I didn't even have work as a distraction as I had started 6 months of disability leave…  it was a long and hard week, perhaps the worst week of my life, but I made it through!

It's been a journey for sure, but overall, I'd have to summarise the two decades with ‘life is good’!

Today I'm thinking that the fatigue is soon going to pass - I did 70 minutes on the treadmill and got off feeling pretty good - not good enough for situps, but good enough to do ten squats… yes, just 10 but that's more than I've been able to do for ages! Things are about to turn around! (does wishful thinking help? or is it more toxic positivity!).

Awesome!

“getting the plants in before the first frost (maybe tonight!)”

“the ferns”

“dogs sleeping in a sun spot”

get away

 I opened my blog editor thinking that I would write up what's been going on for the last week or two (it's been 12 days since I last posted), but alas, my brain can’t even come up with an opening sentence… I’m still struggling with fatigue and have ‘given into it’ the last few days… today I didn't even get out of bed until almost noon! From there I went as far as the sofa, but not as far as the treadmill… it's not seen any action since Monday.

To be fair though, I did have ‘in person’ walking with Kirsten on Tuesday and Wednesday! I ditched Carm after he got home from golf on Monday and drove myself to the villetta for a few days of sister time :-) Very relaxing and totally unproductive…

Tomorrow will be a better day!

At least the weather has continued to be spectacular, with the exception of Wednesday! And goodness knows, I can't remember what it was like at all last week! This past Tuesday, Kirsten and I went to Perth to toddle around - we had a picnic lunch in the amazing park along the river - the perfect way to start October!

Not much else has gone on… we did have supper at Trudie & Leo's last week, and we met up with friends Mary & Gary on Saturday, but most of the rest of the week was spent mooching around doing nothing of note. I'm tired and discouraged and slightly depressed… is it the change of season or a side effect? I don't know yet…

I'm trying to get myself excited about the cruise (42 days to go!)... we got our cabin assigned on Saturday and honestly, I would have cancelled at that moment as the location is the absolute opposite of what we wanted! Instead of a cabin just above the piazza on the 8th floor, we will be on the Lido deck, which for those unfamiliar with cruise ships - that's the deck that the pool and the buffet is on! And is the 16th floor - we like to hang out on the 5th deck… so lots of stairs in between! Too many stairs…

But! We'll make the best of it and who knows, maybe it will be even better! Our focus will certainly change, and since the pool is just down the hall, we'll probably hang out there more :-) There are no lack of bars on the Lido deck, and of course the buffet… it will be too easy to pop over for some grilled shrimp ;-)

Movies under the Stars happens on the Lido deck also - so maybe we'll watch some movies on the big screen - unless they play too much football which is what happened on the last cruise - ugh.

I scanned some of my new clothes into my planning app… but can't seem to concentrate on putting things together to make a packing list - oh, it's early days yet, but I'd like to get a handle on what I have in case there are big gaps in my wardrobe… I've lost some weight since the last cruise so things are fitting a bit differently!

And then there's the whole flying thing… blood clots are a big risk with tamoxifen so I'm not sure if I should start taking baby aspirin before the trip or if I should get some compression socks? 

And then there's the whole being too tired to function thing… how will I manage a vacation if I can barely get through a regular day? Ah, I'll be back to regular energy by then - surely! Or I'll get better at pushing myself through the fatigue…

Awesome!

“a little getaway at the villetta”

“spectacular fall weather!”

“my honey holding down the fort”

“picnic in the park”

“a lazy day”

extended summer

 Winter is coming… the first day of autumn was a beauty, but alas, our bonus summer drought has ended with some cold rain today. But gosh, what a run of nice weather! 

The weekend was spectacular, both the weather and the company! We went to the villetta on Friday afternoon with enough time to settle in and walk the dogs before Olaf & Steph arrived. I'm not sure how the time passed so quickly but the weekend was over before we knew it. 

Saturday, Kirsten, Steph, and I dashed out to Merrickville for a quick shop - I needed some specialty balsamic vinegars to keep my salads tasty through the winter (yes, that awful 6 letter word!). We ran into Mom & Dad who were on their way to Kirsten's. Once we were all back to Kirsten's, we had cake and then visited outside in the glorious weather for the afternoon. I felt crappy though (and not from having too many drinks the night before! I only had 1, honest!), so excused myself for a few hours of rest.

Then it was time to walk the dogs, go for a sauna and swim, and then get things ready for supper. Gosh, I'm not sure how the time passed so quickly but before we could blink an eye, it was midnight and way past everyone's bedtime!

Sunday morning was the usual: coffee at ours, a bit of breakfast in the house, and then we were on our way home :-) It was a great weekend! We need to commit to at least one weekend a year! Sadly though, we were down a brother, and hope that things get better for him soon.

I wish that I could say that I feel back to my ‘old self’, but unfortunately that is not the case. I've been feeling more and more fatigued which is not how I thought things would go - it's been over 5 weeks since radiation ended so I expected to feel energetic and healed by now - and certainly not getting worse by the day! 

I'm not sure if what I'm experiencing is still effects from radiation, or if the tamoxifen is causing it. Or it could even be the change of seasons and the receding sun that is messing me up. From sleuthing on the internet, it seems that tamoxifen side effects can show up anytime/anywhere… there doesn't seem to be a pattern that is common to everyone. I'm not the best at giving myself grace, and honestly, I'm over it! Time to get my energy back!!! But… I will give myself a bit more time and maybe let myself off the hook for another while. I will keep up with the treadmill though - even if I have to dial the intensity back… 

With so many variables, I'm not sure when I should be pushing my way through the fatigue or accepting that I still have to take it easy.  I guess I kind of live in fear of a mood relapse… it's been a long time since I've had a hard time and I really don't want to go there at all!

Awesome!

“birthday gatherings”

“pool and sauna” 

“Snug in bed”

another year has passed

 This goes all the way back to Sunday! Swimming is still happening (barely) and I've spent many hours in the last week ensconced on the deck! We've been having some spectacular September weather that is more like July than a typical September… although I do recall many years of camping at Riverside on site 212 where we had to shelter from the blazing sun in the air conditioned villetta! The week ahead is stretching out with lots of warm sunshine! Hurrah!

Last night (Saturday), we had a spur of the moment supper with Olaf, Stephanie & Freya arriving from Montreal, and Mom & Dad arriving from the city. Takeout pizza was on the menu - I can't remember the last time I had pizza from a shop. It was a good, aliebt heavy, treat that is sitting in my stomach like a lead weight but hey! It was a nice treat! It was fun to get together but sad that everyone wasn't here.

Lupa had a dust up with the clippers this morning and is looking less like a scruffy puppy. She was pretty good today but as always, Carm helps by holding her steady as I buzz around her, shearing the long hair. 

I've been getting better by the day - though I haven't been doing more than 60 minutes on the treadmill and have been keeping the intensity medium. I think tomorrow I'll start amping it up and adding back the other weight bearing exercises. I won't make the mistake I made a few weeks ago when I pushed too hard and set myself back. (note from today: I havn't start amping it up yet!)

Speaking of health… green tea is almost a super food, but matcha tea has even more health benefits… I'm trying to develop a taste for it, but honestly, it makes me feel like puking… perhaps it's not for me. If it just reduced my appetite I could get on board with it for a week or two, but gosh - day two and I'm seriously not sure if I can stomach it. I don't mind the taste too much, but it roils in my stomach and threatens to come back up! It might be worse as I'm having it on an empty stomach… will try after eating the next time I want to risk nausea all afternoon!

Monday was a banner day! We hired some professional window cleaners to do all of the windows, inside and out, and WOW! What an amazing improvement. I knew they were dirty on the outside but gosh, they are sparkling now. And as a bonus, as Tammy was working on the inside, I followed around getting other cleaning done which after a summer of inactivity and excuses not to do housework, it was much needed!

Yesterday the calendar flipped another year - 62! I feel great (considering), and know that I will continue to improve as I work on my fitness and health :-) I'm 20 pounds lighter than I was at 50 and at least as fit. I get way more exercise and looking back at my mood logs, am happier with less anxiety and depression. I'd say the 60s are the new 50s!

It was another amazing summer weather day yesterday! I went into the city to visit with Mom & Dad, then Kirsten joined in for a girls shopping day :-) Followed by scones (so good!). I got home around 4pm, with enough time for a swim and to enjoy a bit of outdoors before crashing on the sofa until supper. Carm cooked up some steaks for us for a special treat and then it was early to bed!

Today’s blue sky is partially obscured with hazy cloud, but I think the forecast high is 28C! Amazing! I've walked on the treadmill, roasted some mushrooms and broccoli, and uncovered the furniture outside for yet another lazy day! I'm out here now… being bothered by a few mosquitos which I can't seem to kill… I'm not sure how long I'll last out here!

Awesome!

“birthday gatherings”

“I got my present from Carm early and love it!”

“September days masquerading as July”

“clean windows!”

“a girls day shopping”

“having the luxury to be lazy”

a bit patient

 There are times when I feel well and truly recovered from my ordeal, but then there are days like yesterday where I pushed myself to do 80 minutes on the treadmill and was left feeling weak and unable to do much else even after breakfast with a protein drink. Today I kept it to 60 minutes but even still, I feel fatigue. I've been having cold chills the last few days, even while bundled up in my quilt in a bit of sunshine. I guess I just have to be a bit patient… 

There have been a few bonus days of sunshine and semi-warmth so I'm capitalising on that and spending my afternoons outside with a book and too much facebook! By 2pm today the clouds had obliterated the blue sky and the radar showed some rain bearing down on us, so I'm back inside. It's going to be cold and rainy starting on the weekend so I'll plan indoor tasks for then (look out Lupa - time for a haircut!).

It's possible that I've already had my last swim :-( The water is an icy 68F which is several degrees colder than I like especially when having cold chills! Carm was in after his golf game today  😱 

We had a lovely supper on Tuesday night with Trudie, Leo, and Pat over for a pasta dish. Piles of roasted zucchini and cherry tomato confit were the base, with some lentil meatballs from the freezer swirled in - I hadn't thought the ‘meatball’ thing through and they basically disintegrated with cooking in the instant pot. It was good though! And there were enough leftovers to have it again last night!

Tonight we'll be back to having tomato sandwiches. We've had lots of those this summer and I'm not even sick of them yet, despite have ZERO bacon! But I've been adding broccoli sprouts, some capers, and occasionally some parm to dress it up a bit - yum!

I downloaded a book about intermittent fasting yesterday so that's my learning focus for the next few days. Biologically I can see that it makes sense as it's only been in the last few thousand years that food has been readily enough available to have breakfast, lunch, supper, and snacks! We would have had to work hard for those meals in the past and our bodies are built to excel without constant food. I've been trying to have a slightly longer overnight fast on most days and usually don't eat until well after my treadmill time.

As it turns out, the fasting book is way more technical than my brain is set up for! Lots of long scientific words about the processes our bodies undergo make it slightly (ha ha way) over my head, but I get the general gist - 14+ hour fasts are good for many of our bodies systems.

The mint I have in pots on the deck has been going crazy! I need to chop it all back and throw it in the freezer for tea but they look so nice I'm reluctant to disturb them.

One of these days I'll actually take some photos…

Awesome!

“sunny September days”

“getting bundled up under my quilt”

“the chilled juice strained off from cooked tomatoes”

“the pink impatiens at the end of the deck”

summers end

 What the heck! It's now a few days past when I wrote this! Today is Monday aka Labour Day! We just got home from a lovely night at Kirsten's and are holed up in the house cause it's windy and cold outside! I'm not going to wax poetic about snuggling under the covers on the camper (I love sleeping in a cold room when I'm warm in bed), nor am I going to go on and on about how great it is to spend time with my sister (it is and Shawn too). I won't talk about the dogs loving their leash walks down the road. No, I'm just going to post this before another week passes!

I wrote this almost a week ago! My energy is coming back! I did a full 80 min (7.4km) walk Saturday and again on Sunday! Plus some extra weights. And I managed to do something in the kitchen… and on top of that cooked supper for Pat. Well, I was pretty wiped out by late afternoon, but I'm feeling optimistic 😀 

We did manage a few hours outside Saturday before a light shower sent us inside, but it stopped in time for us to have supper on the deck with Pat. Carm's been man-handling the lawnmower for the second day in a row, trying to catch up from the week of rain. The grass is long and thick, not at all like you'd expect for the end of August. I'm sure we've set some rainfall records this summer!

So now I'll seguey back to the present (update, the present 3 days ago)! There have been some nice days where I've been exceptionally lazy and just hung out on the deck as well as some cooler days - today is cloudy with rain in the forecast. It's almost 1pm and I'm still in my pjs having skipped the treadmill today - my muscles are crampy and achy after a stressful day yesterday so having a day of rest is probably a good thing.

I can't believe that it is August 30th - summer is over already. It seems like months ago that we were at the beginning of May, but here we are… a summer lost. 

Honestly, I feel so lazy today that I can't even think of anything to write but instead I'll distract myself with a trashy book!

Awesome!

“a few perfect afternoons of reading”

“the villetta which always gives me a sense of comfort”

“everyone quiet after a night away”

“home and the laundry is already done!”

obsessing

 After almost a week of rain I'm back outside, stretched out in the dappled shade at the sofa end of the deck. The sun is about to pass to the blank space which means I'll have to go inside for an hour till the shade of the house descends onto that edge of the deck. I've been in the pool, briefly… the week of cold rain has dropped the temp to 20C - yikes!

The last week has been spent in a haze of inactivity… I have a mountain of zucchini to do something with, and the tomato plants are dragged to the ground with ripe tomatoes that need picking but I've had as close to zero motivation as you can get while still sitting upright. I might have slightly more energy today so hopefully the tide of tired is changing. 

I'll make some tomato sauce tomorrow… but the freezers have become black holes from which nothing is extracted… time to do a reorg and inventory!

Yesterday I went with Mom to her follow-up appointment with the surgeon - he seemed pleased with her recovery but also stressed that radiation side effects can last for years, and that new ones can pop up as time goes on… On a personal note, my skin is starting to show more effects from the radiation than even last week - some of the swelling has gone down but I've started a bit of a rash 😞  but I'm sure it will pass… (she said hopefully - I’m really tired of being tired!). 

We also went to a ‘celebration of life’ for the wife of an old co-worker of Carm's yesterday. It was pretty sad as she was only 70 and passed away suddenly in her sleep - a spouse's worst nightmare.

I've finished reading yet another book about eating for health… ‘Eat to Beat Disease’ by Dr. William Li, was super interesting - if I were young and starting out on my career this is a path I'd be interested in. Research on food is a new field but it makes so much sense to me - our bodies are constantly having chemical reactions so eating to either help or hinder those reactions just seems logical. The book gets into some detail about our bodies 5 defence systems and how certain foods boost each aspect. I'm already eating pretty healthily but with this new knowledge I can fine tune a bit for optimum nutrition and disease prevention.

I've had an interest in food for health for a long time although, unfortunately, COVID turned me from the path and I spent the whole pandemic making recipe after recipe of unhealthy food, with nary a vegetable or fruit in sight unless you could the pineapple in an upside down cake!… but disease is no longer a hypothetical possibility but is a certainty. It certainly changed my mindset. I'm going to take every care that I can to not have to go through this again… 

Broccoli sprouts are apparently some sort of super food to help fight against cancer, so I ordered a sprouting kit from Amazon and have started making them for my salad and to top sandwiches. Pumpernickel is the healthiest bread to eat (the sourdough feeds our biome), so I've been having my sandwiches on that. And green tea is almost a super food so I've upped my consumption of that. Mushrooms, broccoli, cherry tomatoes, blueberries, kiwifruit, kale, pumpkin seeds are all on the disease fighting list - I've been eating those consistently for the last few months.

So what does my food look like on a typical day? I start with a cup of blueberries, 2 kiwis, black coffee, and a vegan protein drink. Lunch is a giant salad with mixed greens, kale, roasted mushrooms & broccoli, tofu, pumpkin seeds, a beet, and half a cup of some sort of legume. Supper is a bit of a wild card - some days I'm tired and give in to my craving for a burger, but usually I keep to healthy. Lately we've been having lots of tomato sandwiches - tonight's was a fried egg on pumpernickel stacked with tomatoes from the garden with a drizzle of balsamic glaze and a heap of broccoli sprouts. I also had some parmesan cheese and a sliced up yellow pepper.  Dr. Li advocates for a mostly plant based diet with some exceptions, like the odd egg or bit of cheese… Tonight I'll have a banana with peanut butter and some dark chocolate! So I'm hardly deprived!

I'm still in the obsessive stage!

Awesome!

“good news at Mom's appointment”

“sunshine back again!”

“Lupa's new orange monkey toy”

“egg salad on pumpernickel with broccoli sprouts”