sunshine on my shoulders

The sun was already shining when I opened my eyes this morning and as I took a moment to enjoy the golden light coming in the door, I realized that the sun was shining inside me as well :-)

I know I've said this before, but somehow, for some reason, writing out what I'm going through sorts it all out in my head which releases negative feelings leaving room for hope again. It helps that I'm not feeling so wiped out and actually had energy to move around the house getting the odd thing done. 

It didn't feel like I was in hell as I made 2 cakes for the weekend - no! It felt good and comfortable. I felt at peace as the kitchen-aid whipped each batch of eggs & sugar till fluffy. Carm helped me fold in the flour and cranberries for the second cake - it's surprisingly physical! The first cake had my arms like rubber. But I didn't fret about it and was able to (barely) accept that this is where I am… for now!

I even had the spoons to make the biga for 2 batches of focaccia that I'll finish tomorrow. And now, writing this at 4:30, I still have enough energy to make supper! Carm helped by peeling and cubing a big butternut squash while I got the rest of the ingredients ready: caramelised onions from the freezer, dried lentils, garlic, sage from the garden, and some brussels sprouts which I will roast. It will be a change to all the sandwiches that Carm has been forced to subsist on!

The dogs got two short trips to the field - the first outing was peaceful… the second outing this afternoon was not… the cows were just over the fence line which had Adia & Lupa in a tizzy! But they were good and mostly listened to me calling them back.

Oh, and the repair guy from Bell was here again! This time it was a different connection that had come undone! If we've had two connection failures, how many other people are having difficulty as well? It seems that something could be improved - either equipment or procedure…

Awesome!

“waking up to sunshine”

“the milkweed in the field is turning red”

“the sky was an impossible blue”

“cooking and eating food from our garden”

“getting the internet fixed”

“having enough energy to actually do a few things”

“ending the day feeling as good as I started the day!!!!!!”