25 days away

 This afternoon I harvested what is surely the last of my sage! We've had temps down to -10C and yet it soldiers on. I rescued 2 pumpkins from Mom's yard - we got them cut up and roasted so now I have a freezer full of pumpkin! 

Even though we had a trip to the bloodletters this morning, I felt a bit like cooking and I'd put aside some of that pumpkin that I wanted to use quickly... I'd saved a recipe that sounded good but after a quick read of the reviews, decided that it would need some help. So from bland to a lovely, slightly spicy, pumpkin sage chickpea soup topped with crispy bacon & sage. It was quite good!

It's been a busy few days! Friday we had lunch at Jo Ellen & Don’s (thanks!) followed by an expedition to Costco (it was a zoo). As usual, Lupa was frantic when we got home - I didn't review the video to see if there was any howling but I imagine there was.

Saturday morning, exactly one month from Christmas, I drove into town to help Mom decorate the tree! By help, I mean sitting watching, occasionally jumping up to hang on to her as she climbed the stepstool, stepping onto the arm of the sofa, teetering as she stretched out to reach the highest bough. That's my Mom!

Trudie & Leo came for supper Sunday so I got busy in the kitchen. I'd planned a traditional Italian Sunday supper - spaghetti with a homemade tomato sauce with some meatballs and riblets on the side. Instead of garlic bread (which is really North American anyway), I made some garlic knots - bready twists with garlic butter. 

For dessert I made pumpkin muffins with almond flour - I was a bit stunned as I had skipped breakfast, so I fumbled the measuring cup of maple syrup, not once, not twice, but three times. Yikes! And it gets worse! After ten minutes in the oven, I suddenly realized that I forgot to add the chocolate chips and cranberries - I pulled the tray from the oven and quickly sprinkled on some chocolate chips. It is slightly ironic as the reason I'd chosen this recipe is because I thought it would be a reasonably healthy protein rich quick breakfast that would hopefully reduce brain fog...

Awesome!

“decorating the tree with Mom”

“Greek on Wheels”

“the nurse finding my vein right away with only one jab”

“seeing Jupiter just to the side of the moon at 4 am”

harvesting herbs

 Blech! Still grey! There was a time that I thought to repaint the great room grey and add more grey 'things'... alas, I did add a few grey things but LUCKILY we didn't repaint as I know now that it would have created a space that is depressing all the time, not just when we are socked in with low clouds!

We just replaced the cover on the squishy loveseat with another grey one and now I wish I had gone with another colour… so I'll be stuck with that for a few years…

Same with the camper… I thought that I'd go grey with the new sofa but now I know that it would be too dark and dreary - I want to lighten that space up, not dim it…

Yesterday I talked about all Mom's appointments, but I didn't mention that Graham has been bringing Mom to many of her radiation appointments - it's great that she has that support at home. As of tomorrow she'll be 76% done! (yes, we are counting the days!)

I harvested some more herbs today! Parsley, sage, and oregano are very hardy! We've had nights well below freezing but still they soldier on… I think I got the last of it today. It got chopped and thrown into the lentil soup that I made for lunch. We've been having a proper lunch for a few weeks now - lots and lots of lentils and tons of vegetables gives us a head start on our day. So much fibre… it takes at least 45 minutes to get it into the pot so I make a big batch to have servings for a few days.

Tonight we had a nice supper with Pat. After supper we cosied up to watch a few episodes of the Orville!

Awesome!

“harvesting herbs in the snow”

“getting a good nights sleep”

“grass crispy with frost”

“leftover gravy with bits of meat - amazing on fries! Almost a poutine”

in a fog

 I've been trying for 10 minutes to write the first paragraph of this post, but alas, I just can't come up with anything that makes me happy. I think my brain is as grey and dreary as the day is - after an evening of freezing rain, followed by some snow, we are left with clouds that have sunk to ground level obliterating the horizon as well as any good cheer.

It's been one and a half weeks since I last wrote… Not only has my muse left me, she slammed the door in my face!

I guess it's all been the usual stuff with the odd appointment with Mom thrown in. Last week I took Mom to her various Wednesday appointments, then Carm and I took a trip to Costco on Thursday (always more expensive when I go!), first dropping off Mom and Dad to the hospital for their appointments. On Friday I joined up with Kirsten to take Mom to her 3 appointments - we made it a bit of a girls day :-) 

So many appointments for all of us!

Mom has 9 radiation treatments left (out of 30) - we are counting down the days. She's not able to eat solids so has been living on meal replacement drinks - of course the weight is sliding off her :-(  I need to nag her! 

We picked up two little fake Christmas trees for the front deck but they looked bare with just fairy lights - a trip to Dollarama fixed that! Some pretty red balls to the rescue! The trees are a bit on the small side but a big improvement over the empty urns…

Sunday Kirsten and Shawn came for lunch, then Monday morning I got a haircut (Jessica). In the afternoon I went to Mom and Dad's to spend the night. Kirsten came too so it was a fun family evening. We took Graham to his MRI appointment late Monday night, then were up early to take Mom to her radiation appointment and visit with her radiologist oncologist. Mom and I went to her hairdresser while Kirsten took Dad for a fun shopping outing. I was anxious to get home as the freezing rain and snow were bearing down on us. I'm getting less stressed about driving but was on the edge of a freakout at the thought of driving in freezing rain…

I've been reading a bit more lately but I'm thinking now that the horribly written book that I just finished reading sucked all the intelligence from my brain. I won't name the book/author but will say that she's had countless best sellers… If I were teaching a creative writing class I would use this book as an example of how telling the story is not as effective as showing the story. It's so repetitive. The last book I read (Girl in Pieces) was the opposite. It was a gripping book that told the story of a girl in a mental health crisis. It made me think and maybe gain compassion which is the best one could ask for in a book!

Last week (or was it the week before?), I made a white bean, sausage, and sweet potato stew which has become one of my favourites - it's super easy and with a few herbs gleaned from the garden (yes, as late as Sunday I was harvesting sage, oregano, and parsley!), is a tasty supper filled with healthy things, excluding the sausage of course!

Awesome!

“my sister”

“cinnamon cake”

“the sun when it shows up”

“getting through a blog post even though my brain is in a fog”

dreary November

 The sky wept icy grey tears, obliterating all colour, masking the point where the ground meets the sky. Everything inside and outside seemed to be different shades of the same drab grey. Nothing like a monochrome snowy day to invigorate (heavy sarcasm)...

By yesterday the snow was all gone and the skies had cleared (well, mostly)! Yesterday the wind howled. Today a sunny sky and lack of windchill tempted me out of the house and into the field with the dogs - by the time we were most of the way to the east edge, my coat was hanging off my shoulders and I could feel the sun's warmth on my back. Lovely and a bit motivating 😀 

Last Sunday we celebrated with big unctuous bowls of spaghetti carbonara - or my version of it which is a meld between that and spaghetti cacio e pepe… in other words, I add bacon and skip the egg! Cause what isn't better than bacon! I set the table with a cloth from Rome and candle sticks from Morano, dim the lights and put on music. It sets the stage for an evening of reminiscing about our trips :-) 

Monday we had supper at Trudie & Leo's… years ago, our visits with them would last far into the night but these days we rarely make it to eight pm! 

Tuesday I was up early to take Mom to her radiation appointment. She's been taking herself most days but I try to go on the day she meets with the doctor. Then we met up with Kirsten for a trip to Ikea :-)  The restaurant was having technical difficulties so it didn't open for almost 2 hours which gave us plenty of time to look at absolutely everything! I scoped out a new sofa for the camper and was tempted by a plethora of storage and organizing options… be still my heart! Such fun!

I have dreams of revamping the decor of the trailer with wallpaper (the dingy beige is yuck), removing the window treatments (except the blinds) , maybe replacing them with light airy curtains instead of the heavy synthetic tan ones, and replacing some of the furniture. Of course this will never happen as I am both too lazy to do the work and too cheap to spend the money. But it's nice wintertime dreaming ;-)

Wednesday Carm and I had our annual visits with our doctor - yes we actually have a real family doctor… he did ask me if I was being followed by a psyc doctor - when I said no, he commented that fewer doctors are going that route. Luckily for me I got sick almost 20 years ago when the situation wasn't so dire. Although even back then it was hard to find one taking new patients, but luckily, my family doctor was able to refer me to Dr. Beck who I'd seen years before. He still had my records as a patient and since I was 'on the books' took me back. I live in a certain amount of fear that I'll have a setback and will be on my own…

Friday we got jabbed for flu and covid! Strangely, even though we were busy many of the days, it seemed that the week took forever to end. The dreary weather didn't help…

As I was puttering around the kitchen this morning making a lentil soup for lunch, I wondered… how many hours in a year do I spend making food? What would we do if I didn't enjoy cooking? What else would I do with all that time? It's one of those jobs that is never done… Sisyphus comes to mind except instead of a giant rock it's a cutting board and a knife. And then there are the dishes! Carm does the lion's share but when I'm cooking I usually wash as I go - it's amazing how many bowls are required to make a cake!

Yesterday I was looking for something new to cook - I had 2 Italian sausages and some potatoes that needed using up - after an internet search I settled on sausage potato casserole. Not exactly healthy fare, especially with cream of mushroom soup and cream… but it was surprisingly good and easy enough to make.

Awesome!

“cranberry cake”

“sausages and potatoes”

off the hand rails

 We were blessed with bright sunshine yesterday so our drive to get frozen meat for the dogs was pleasant, especially contrasted with times that we've had to journey in a blizzard… we buy the raw food from a company in Quebec that brings a transport truck once a month to a spot about 45 minutes away from here. It's a busy pickup with at least a hundred cars in line. The food used to come in huge clear plastic bags with 40lbs of brick shaped blocks helter skelter - we were surprised to find they've transitioned to vacuum packed packages that fit neatly into boxes, which in turn, stack into the freezer in much less space! Next time we can get 5 boxes instead of just 3.

Once we got home and after a quick bowl of lentil soup, we got busy changing the tires on the car - winters at the ready. Carm does all the hard work and I just stand around handing him things and being a second set of eyes - all bolts get double tightened with a torque drill. Then, as the sun moved around to the front of the house, we installed the new handrail on the front stairs! It seems sturdy and looks great. The deck does need some decor though!

Backtracking a bit… Pat came for supper on Thursday night - I tortured her with almost-vegan lentil 'meatloaf'. Not vegan cause I served it with beefy gravy leftover from the stew the other night - yum! I could drink that stuff straight from the pot. We watched 3 episodes of the Orville together :-) Should have made it into an official watching party with popcorn and the lights dimmed.

Friday Lupa got a haircut and looks bright and sassy again! She cooperates reasonably well except for her muzzle - the cordless clippers help there. I've been keeping her legs longer so have to scissor those… it's a bit of a butcher job (well, no blood was let!)

Today I've been deploying a battalion of batteries into countless candles and fairy lights - it will be almost dark at 4:30 tonight (boo hiss), so we need to create our own light to protect against the creatures of the dark.

We've been enjoying watching 'the Orville' on Disney+. It's a takeoff on Star Trek put together by Seth McFarlane and takes on current social dilemmas - there's a feast of food for thought.

The dogs are miserable, sure that we've forgotten to feed them - the clock says 4:30 but their tummies say we are already ½ hour late with supper! They don't understand standard time!

Awesome!

“cantaloupe”

“new handrail”

“bright sun on a cool morning”

“getting all sweaty on the treadmill”

into the gloom

 'They' say that November is the darkest month of the year but this year October is in the running - so many cloudy days. Of course the first two days of November are dreary so perhaps it's going to get worse :-(

The sun shone for the whole day Tuesday :-) which was great as Mom and I were in and out of the car a bunch of times… It was a busy day for Mom with radiation and a bunch of other related appointments at the hospital, and we even managed to shoehorn in some retail therapy at the thrift store (we both brought home some treasures!). Once you get into the system, the cancer centre supports your journey with dieticians, speech therapists, nurses, audiologists, counselling, etc. There are handouts and videos. It's a hard slog for sure, but they do everything they can to ease the discomforts.

The day started at 6am with me freaking out about how dark it was and the heavy frost on the road… I don't drive in the dark and have slight ptsd about slippery roads… but I made it and it wasn't so bad. Luckily the moon was almost full and hadn't set yet so it wasn't pitch dark. It may not seem impressive, but for me it was a huge deal and the pit of fear in my stomach was real! I reminded myself that other people can do it, and surely I'm not THAT disabled! And so I did it :-)

By the time I got home just after 5pm I was exhausted and happy to have beef stew leftovers for supper :-)  No yorkshire pudding but it was delicious. I still have some leftover gravy so tonight we'll have black-eyed pea burgers and fries with gravy.

I had plans yesterday to give Lupa a much needed haircut but decided that she needed a bath first so into the tub she went. She puts up with it fairly well (although what choice does she have) and is now squeaky clean and ready for a haircut Friday. I figured two assaults in one day was enough - a bath and getting their nails clipped are nobody's favourite activities. 

The other day I mentioned that I made chickpea brownies to take to Trudie's… I'm still snacking on them :-)  I think they make great breakfast food and a good way to get some legumes into my stomach! Who can feel guilty when they are eating beans! (and isn't chocolate a bean too).  

I read this quote: “Grief is the price we pay for love”. It took a while, but now there is only a hint of sadness in my smile when I see photos of Spike. Our little grey shrimp hasn't taken his place in my heart but the laughter that she brings to our lives everyday is a ray of sunshine.

November second!!! Almost time to switch house decor from fall to winter :-( On Sunday after the time change I'll put out all the fairy lights - I love the tiny points of light on a long winter night.

Awesome!

“spending the day with my Mom with a few visits with Dad & Graham thrown in for good measure”

“a belated birthday gift from Graham - purple almost pink!”

“apres bath puppy zoomies”

“Carm vacuumed all the nooks and crannies while I was gone!”

“getting home after a long day - gate open and pets already fed”

“Lupa running in the long grass in the hay field - she bounds and leaps and makes us laugh”