Tuesday, December 17, 2024

hair raising

The low grey clouds matched my mood exactly… I started off my day Monday wondering if lithium could have caused my heart issue so I did a bit of googling… and yes, especially if there were periods of raised levels which there were. I had a period of about 6 months several years ago where my energy got lower and lower - I was literally dragging myself through life - my psyc doctor tested my lithium levels and they were elevated… it could have been around that time that I started having heart palpitations on a fairly regular basis…

It seems likely that the lithium was the cause - I stopped it 2 years ago and my heart palpitations have coincidently become less frequent and less severe. It was pure dumb luck that I had palps while waiting to see the doctor last week so it was in my head - I might not have thought to mention it otherwise. My pcp set up an appointment for an ultrasound and 2 weeks with a holter monitor… which was supposed to be sent out Monday so I'd be stuck wearing the stupid thing over Christmas and New Year which SUCKS! After a bit of a freak out, Carm suggested calling the company to see if I could reschedule for the New Year and luckily they hadn't sent it out yet so I was able to put it off till January… 

I'll admit to having a bit of a breakdown over all of this! One more sucky thing to deal with, but actually now that I've had a bit of time to think about it, it's all good and I'm glad to have a simple explanation for the condition, and now that I'm off the lithium, have lost weight, and am exercising, I've reduced the triggers and shouldn't have any trouble going forward.

Sunday I made a few dozen cardamom buns for our family Christmas celebration later this month. They freeze nicely so it felt like a good idea to get it done ahead of time. Who knows what might happen in the next week and as you know, bread making is pretty much a whole day sort of task!



Awesome!

“getting home from the city”

Sunday, December 15, 2024

bread in the oven

It's a bright sunny day again today! But winter is upon us and it is freezing! I’ve been lucky enough to only see it through the window so far today but I'll make a point of taking the dogs out for a romp later… after I've cooled down and un-sweated from the treadmill!



Friday we met with Ken and Francine for lunch in the village. It was lovely to catch up with them again and feel happy that I'm getting to know Francine better 😀 After that we did errands and then raced home so I could start caramelising onions for the supper I was making for Trudie & Leo. 


It's a fairly long process but the results make it worth it. After the onions and garlic were caramelised (in the instant pot), I deglazed with ¼ cup marsala, added some fresh thyme and then instead of rice, I used barley which was an excellent substitution. I added the barley to the instant pot and cooked it for 15 minutes, released the pressure, added the lentils, and cooked for another 10 minutes at high pressure, then a natural release. I used it to stuff a home-grown butternut squash that I had roasted in the oven. Topped with grated gruyere cheese and re-heated in the oven: 5/5!


To keep to the cooking theme I seem to be stuck on today, I did the brussels sprouts a little differently. Instead of just roasting straight from the cutting board, I soaked them in salted water for 30+ minutes, drained, rinsed, and dried, and then roasted in the airfryer. I think they turned out a bit more tender - Carm thought they were better than usual. I certainly had no trouble eating them and stuffed my face!


Well ha ha! That was all yesterday… I never did make it out of the house and somehow the day got away from me and I spent too much time dozing on the sofa. Not today though! I got up at a reasonable time, walked on the treadmill while chatting with Kirsten, made cardamom buns in prep for Christmas, and tamed the spare bedroom for overnight guests later this week. I think it was sunny this morning but it certainly isn't now (3:30pm)... 




Awesome!


“seeing new muscles in my legs”

“dogs asleep in the afternoon”

“my new earbuds!”

“giant pot of bean & vegetable soup”

Thursday, December 12, 2024

I will

Yesterday a photo of Spike and I at the office popped up from ‘this day’ in 2009… it was maybe his first day at the office as a service dog… Coincidentally, yesterday was also the 3rd anniversary of his death. I won't lie - I had a tiny cry but also took a few minutes to think about how much Lupa has partially filled the hole in my heart that he left gaping. She's curled up against me on the sofa as I write this, warming my legs, and my heart. ❤️ 


The days are racing to Christmas and yet all I have is the tree up for decoration. I got Carm to carry it upstairs last week and that's about as much effort as I've put in and it was Carm that put in the most effort. I don't want to be a whiner, but I will for a minute… since August, when I started the tamoxifen, I've been draggy and low. Not terrible, just not motivated. Everything is an effort. Luckily, I've had 20 years of overcoming lethargy to practice getting myself going! Most of the time!


Today I put a single word on the treadmill to motivate me: THRIVE. That's what I want to do and keep doing! Most days I put in a herculean effort and walk for an hour - today I did 3.8 miles, over half at 6% incline, a bit at 7%, and the rest at 5% - and have been adding 10 minutes on the bike and today a few minutes with weights and planks. By the time that is all done, I'm finished for the day and barely get anything else done… but I'm at least getting fitter! I still see improvements in my muscle tone and am excited to start the weights for my upper body  😀  My legs are in great shape and are so much stronger than when I started last February.



We had doctors appointments yesterday, just the usual annual prescription renewal and overall checkup. The doctor came in fresh from seeing Carm so he'd already heard about our weight loss and my exercise, and of course our plant-based diet. I lamented to him about having to exercise for an hour and restrict my calories to keep the weight off but he confirmed that it's a common theme for women who lose a lot of weight, especially at my age, and to just keep doing what I'm doing. He asked if I was planning on losing more weight and was supportive for another 5 pounds to come off. He also reiterated that keeping the weight off and keeping up with the exercise was important for long term health with regards to breast cancer. 


And that's what motivates me the most - keeping cancer at bay. I don't think of it often, and usually only in a ‘third person’ sort of way, but sometimes when I'm justifying my choices I think to myself: ‘I just fucking had fucking cancer! and have to take drugs for another 4 ¾ years! to reduce risk of a reoccurance’. If that isn't motivation to eat healthily and exercise I don't know what is!


The doctor has also set me up for a holter monitor and referred me for a heart ultrasound to make sure that my abnormal ecg results are not an indication of anything serious! When I was in for surgery last May the nurses and doctors kept making comments about my low heart rate and I had to reassure them that it was normal for me.



Not everything has been a drag though! Last Friday I met up with Kirsten and Mom for our annual trip to Ikea! We poked around for hours and of course stopped for lunch - who can pass up the meatballs, mashed potatoes, gravy and lingonberry jam 😀 I chose the plant balls rather than the meat balls which I actually prefer. They were moist and flavourful. Unfortunately they don't sell them frozen or I would have brought some home with me. I have a couple of nice plant ball recipes so I'll have to get busy in the kitchen - they are a lot of work though!


I've gone from being hot all the time to freezing all the time! Not sure what has precipitated that change but I'm not happy about it! Carm has been my hero by taking the dogs outside most of the time so I don't get even more chilled. xoxo my honey


Well, that was more than a minute of whining! Sorry!


We've had a lot of meals on repeat this fall so this week I've been trying to make some new things. One night we had lentil loaf with mashed potatoes & green beans, but also chopped up some peppers and sauteed them with garlic, ginger, basil, and a bit of kale to use as a side. It was good! Tonight I roasted sweet potato cubes, and in another pot sauteed garlic, ginger, chopped red peppers, cherry tomatoes, kale, Thai garden red curry paste, and white kidney beans. We tossed it with the sweet potato and some roasted broccoli for a flavourful dinner.


I find it too easy to get into a cooking rut and all my old favorites are off the table as they have ground beef or pork in them  😞  As it is, yesterday I made a giant pot of soup which we will eat for supper several times this week! Thank goodness that Carm loves soup and would eat it everyday without complaint ❤️. 




Awesome!


“seeing new muscles in my legs”

“dogs asleep in the afternoon”

“my new earbuds!”

“giant pot of bean & vegetable soup”

Thursday, December 5, 2024

stuck

We've been home for over a week now and still the yearning for Caribbean sun has not waned! There is snow on the ground, which should be motivating me to get Christmas decorating started, but alas, I just can't get into the mood for it yet. Yesterday I started playing Christmas music… it hasn't done its magic yet!

Part of the problem today is that I stayed in bed until past 10am! I stupidly forgot my meds last night which leaves me feeling nauseous and draggy for the rest of the day. I thought something was off when I woke up, but I rolled over and pulled the covers over my head… until Carm burst into the room to say that they were sitting on the counter still - DOOH! That was 8am… 2 more hours of sleep and I could almost go about my day normally.

I was still dragging myself a bit so I only managed 40 minutes on the treadmill with Kirsten… tomorrow I'll do better!

I actually left the house today (aside from taking the dogs to get their nails done)! First time since we got home 😱 I do know how to hibernate… 

I need some of that energy that I had the first few days of our cruise! I have a hard time remembering that we walked and jogged on the track on our first 2 sea days!

We got new phones the week before we left on our trip - we both love them. I love the camera on mine and should get outside to take some photos, but the grey skies do not inspire! Instead I'll stay inside and take photos of food!


4:15 and Grace's light just came on… apparently, today we start to gain light at night (one second) but we still lose in the morning until January 6th. 


Awesome!

“fresh white snow”
“those potato puffs in the freezer”