revelations

 I arrived home a little past noon, refreshed and with some new ideas for improving my mental health. A few days away with lots of time to think was just what I needed. The fact that I had very little anxiety while I was at the villetta gave me a few clues. So what have I learned?

Music. I had music playing for almost the entire time I was away; could the musical background have distracted my subconscious?

Sleep. I’ve been sleep deprived since Spike passed away last December - last year, when I was so fantastic, I was sleeping a solid 9 hours a night.

Facebook. I wasn’t on FB at all while at the villetta. Perhaps all those Karen stories get to me more than I realize. Instead of FB, I read, and even if it wasn’t fine literature it might have had a positive effect on my mood.

Social. Visiting with Kirsten and the girls was a change from my normal. I do try to have friends over as often as possible but maybe sometimes silly girly sisterly things are what I need.

I was wondering if my anxiety trigger was Carm but it wasn’t hard to rule that out. Actually, as soon as I figured out the other triggers I had a huge sense of relief and knew with blinding clarity that Carm is not a trigger but an anti-trigger if you will. Without him I’d be lost.

An ocean of blue sky dotted with fluffy tigers, boats, and dogs racing across the surface was our ceiling as we spent the rest of the afternoon reading (and writing) while stretched up on the sofa outside. Well, dang! Isn’t this the life!

Carm is outside with me, hobbling around on a wounded foot. Bad things always seem to happen when I’m away… yesterday Carm stepped on a nail :-(  We’ll keep a close eye on the wound as punctures can sometimes be tricky.

Speaking of foot wounds… years ago, when I was a kid, I would be barefoot all summer. One time I stepped on a lit cigarette butt at the Winnipeg Zoo. Another time I sliced my foot open and didn’t show my parents… well, since I never properly washed it or bandaged it and continued with my barefoot lifestyle it’s no surprise that the wound got infected. A few days later my parents noticed a red line creeping up my leg so off to the hospital I went. I remember the doctor digging around in my foot (it hurt!). I suppose I was on antibiotics as well.

Awesome!

“arriving home”

“a line of trees silhouetted against a blue summer sky”

“sitting outside!”

“the rain stopping just when I had to take the dogs outside”