Wednesday, August 10, 2022

defrosted

 The song of the cicadas reminds me that the last days of summer are slipping past like quicksilver. I feel that we were in limbo for the whole 3 weeks while the deck was being built… that’s a huge percentage of the most wonderful weeks of warm weather… and now… it could be a few scant weeks until swimming season is gone. 


Tuesday (after making a huge batch of inedible scones), I drove to the villetta for a few nights. I had plans to do a thorough cleaning but I didn’t do much other than read. I was in the middle of a book about a Miniature Schnauzer but when he got sick I had to put the book down. Next up, a really lame Harlequin type romance that had no redeeming features other than being a distraction. I guess it couldn’t have been that bad as I started another one right away. How can there be so many billionaires… a simple millionaire is no longer good enough! 


The problem with these mindless forays into really bad writing is that they don’t feed my creativity, instead my writing seems to mimic what I’ve read and seems awkward and forced but without miraculous proclamations of undying love.


I did get the fridge defrosted - the ice was threatening to burst the fins. 


When Kirsten and/or the girls weren’t visiting the music played (surprise!), I easily passed the day putzing around. A bit of a walk down the road tired the dogs out (hopefully).


Adia has regressed and is wrecking things whenever she’s left alone. Food on the counter is no longer safe - even the fly swatter is a target. I guess we have to go back to square one :-(


I’ve been having terrible anxiety for months now… after a full year of no issues I’m on the verge of tears for much of my days and have been experimenting with both behaviour modification and drugs. It’s not clear exactly what the cause is but it’s clear that I can’t handle anything out of the ordinary that life throws at me… or even the ordinary things... Last year, with covid and everything, I was doing great, perhaps the best that I’d been for decades but all that has changed. Why? I’ll be happily going about my day when WHAM, out of nowhere it feels like I’m in a car careening out of control, about to hit a brick wall. It’s hard to catch my breath.


We did some birthday celebration planning today… how can it be possible that I’ll be 60 in just over a month. I’m pretty sure I was in my 30s last week. (the 20s does seem decades ago).



Awesome!


“arriving at the villetta”

“having a quiet afternoon with a lovely walk thrown in”

“my sister”

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